希望沟壑

婚姻关系、亲子关系抓得很准，细节满满，最后儿子对父母说的话很感人“Forgive me for needing you to be strong forever. Forgive me for fearing your unhappiness. As you suffer, I shall suffer. Hold my hands and walk the old walk one last time, then let me go.”

最开始对这位强势的妻子很反感，觉得是自作自受。看到最后，却是敬佩。29年的爱情大梦被最爱的人硬生生砸醒，毫不留情。29年的时光，29年的信念，29年的爱人，统统烟消云散。想过死吧应该。但还是蹒跚的一步一步在时间里熬出来。

她最终还是那个强势的女人。她没有因为这个巨大的打击而发生任何变化。她背负着这一切过往和痛苦继续在自己的人生路上独行。

她儿子最后的念白我真的很喜欢。受了巨大创伤的母亲选择坚强乐观的继续自我人生路，懦弱犹疑的父亲终于为了爱情为自己做出了选择。人生的选择题不会因为你年老就停止出现，父母即使已经老去也要给出答案。父母们在人生的道路上永远走在孩子的面前，他们面对人生境遇变化而做出的选择，会不断影响他的一生。真的很感动。最后的念白摘抄如下：

” I begin by thinking I could save you but in the end all I can do is honour you.

My mother, first among women, my warmth and my comfort,

My safety, my pride, you are the one I want to please.

You are the one I want to applaud me

My father, first among men, my teacher and my judge. The man,

I know I will become

You grow older now

You’ll still ahead of me as you’ll always be, forever

Further down the road

Forgive me for needing you to be strong forever

Forgive me for fearing your unhappiness

As you suffer, so I shall suffer

As you endure, as I shall endure

Hold my hand and walk the old walk one last time

Then let me go“

“-You’re wrong. Tell him, Edward.

-Tell him what?

-That God exists.

-You can’t tell people a thing like,God’s not information. God’s a conviction . It’s like love. You don’t tell love. You feel love.

-That’s right. That’s just how it is.

-I love you, Edward,whether I want to or not.

And I never thought in a million years you’d stop loving me.

-You must get over it, darling.

You must forth come.

-Well, it doesn’t seem to be very easy.

-But you do want to.

-Grace, Grace,can’t we...Can’t we be friends?

-Friends,uh,no. I don’t think so. It all went on too long,didn’t it?

-I wish ...

-You wish we’d never met?

-No,of course,not.

-I do. I do. I wish we’d never met. I’d wish I’d never loved you, but we did and I do. I did. And now I have to try and let you go.

-Don’t think too badly of me.

-I try not to think of you at all. I’m getting quite good at it during the day. But at night, I dream about you. Unfair, isn’t it? ”

电影后半段在hope gap散步, Jamie和Grace谈起“get out”的时候Jamie说我只是有些受到惊吓，Grace很快接下去说到为了什么？我的不开心程度吗？Jamie顿了一下说，是啊。Grace远眺了一下，说道其实我也被吓到了…

在真实生活中，我是Jamie。我和我妈有过一模一样的对话。所以不难想象这段会如此精准而深刻地击中了我。（注一）但我妈当时的回答是那我能怎么办呢，眼神中好像在说你帮不上忙还要来质问我。这一幕多年之后还是haunt me。我多么希望我妈当时如电影中一样回答我，让我知道不是我一个人被吓到了。承认被吓到了，我们都被吓到了，现在我们可能不能做什么，但在未来的某一天我们和不开心可能可以共处。但我妈当时确实已经被击垮了，我并不能也无法要求她太多了。

真正经历过不开心的人知道，我们对ta的恐惧、厌恶、和每次几乎都像第一次一样的不知所措。所以当Grace去了Angela家，Angela说出“在我看来，情况就是原来有三个不高兴的人，现在只有一个了”的时候，我感到愤怒和伤心。愤怒她作为开心的那个人说出这话。悲伤，好像我又重新感受了一遍被留下成为不开心的人的伤心，Grace的伤心，我为我妈背负的伤心。但开心的一方也会抱着罪恶感吧，如果他们有的话。

Hope gap. 希望沟壑，片名起得太好，让我想起梁文道（？）有次说过爱情，就像是向他人的冒险。你永远无法控制/强迫，甚至真切的了解另外一个人的想法。我们所能做的，只有希望，祈求上帝show us mercy，去弥补这人和人之间的沟壑（even only for a while)

其实我还挺羡慕Jamie的，这件事发生的时候他已经成年了受的影响相对小一些。但如果这件事发生在我成年，我不是很确定我妈还有没有可能再次站起来。可惜我连和我爸妈快乐的时候都想不起来了，可能是为了把不开心封印而一起封印了吧。

但如同Jamie对Grace说的，如果你可以扛过去那我会觉得我也可以（注二）。有时候在深深的井底，我会想起多年前小小的我可以把自己挖出来，那这一次我还是可以。

注一：看到电影是导演真实情况改编，怪不得

注二：Jamie说这一段话之前先说的是如果你扛不过去，没关系。不要为了我硬抗。那我会知道前面的黑暗太甚，不开心赢了。（大意）让我想要抱住他！长大了！

Sudden Light 明灭之间

BY Dante Gabriel Rossetti

I have been here before,

But when or how I cannot tell:

I know the grass beyond the door,

The sweet keen smell,

The sighing sound, the lights around the shore.

我曾来过这里，

但是说不清是何时何故：

我记得门外的野草

和他们那清甜的味道，

海潮的叹息和岸边的灯火。

You have been mine before,—

How long ago I may not know:

But just when at that swallow's soar

Your neck turn'd so,

Some veil did fall,—I knew it all of yore.

你曾经属于我，

是多久之前我已记不得：

但就在燕子腾空的一刹那，

你回头看见了我，

面纱也随之垂落——但那已经是很久以前的事了。

Has this been thus before?

And shall not thus time's eddying flight

Still with our lives our love restore

In death's despite,

And day and night yield one delight once more?

是早已如此？

还是因为经历了时间的漩涡，

我们的爱随着生活的过往开始修复。

就算置生死于不顾，

还能否在日夜的更替间再寻得一丝欢愉？

The Old Walk

像往常一样的散步

by William Nicholson (writer/director)

I began by thinking I could save you,

but in the end all I can do is honor you.

My mother, first among women,

my warmth and my comfort, my safety, my pride.

You are the one I want to please,

you are the one I want to applaud me.

开始我以为能拯救你，

但最后只能赞颂你。

我的母亲，我最爱的女人，我的温暖和安逸，安全和自豪。

我只想取悦你，

我只想让你为我骄傲。

My father first among men,

my teacher and my judge,

the man I know I will become.

You grow older now,

you are still ahead of me as you will always be, forever further down the road.

我的父亲，我最爱的男人，

我的老师，我的裁判，

是我以后会成为的那个人。

虽然你已经不再年轻，

但你还是一如往常地走在我的前面，走在比我远的路上。

Forgive me for needing you to be strong forever.

Forgive me for fearing your unhappiness.

As you suffer so I shall suffer.

As you endure I shall endure.

Hold my hands and walk the old walk one last time, then let me go.

原谅我对你的需要，需要你永远坚强。

原谅我对你的担心，担心你的不快乐。

因为你痛苦我就痛苦

你难受我就难受

请握着我的手

最后一次

像往常一样去散步

然后让我走。

For The Fallen

by Laurence Binyon

With proud thanksgiving, a mother for her children,

England mourns for her dead across the sea.

Flesh of her flesh they were, spirit of her spirit,

Fallen in the cause of the free.

Solemn the drums thrill; Death august and royal

Sings sorrow up into immortal spheres,

There is music in the midst of desolation

And a glory that shines upon our tears.

They went with songs to the battle, they were young,

Straight of limb, true of eye, steady and aglow.

They were staunch to the end against odds uncounted;

They fell with their faces to the foe.

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old:

Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.

At the going down of the sun and in the morning

We will remember them.

They mingle not with their laughing comrades again;

They sit no more at familiar tables of home;

They have no lot in our labour of the day-time;

They sleep beyond England's foam.

But where our desires are and our hopes profound,

Felt as a well-spring that is hidden from sight,

To the innermost heart of their own land they are known

As the stars are known to the Night;

As the stars that shall be bright when we are dust,

Moving in marches upon the heavenly plain;

As the stars that are starry in the time of our darkness,

To the end, to the end, they remain.

Say not the Struggle nought Availeth

BY arthur Hugh Clough

Say not the struggle nought availeth,

The labour and the wounds are vain,

The enemy faints not, nor faileth,

And as things have been they remain.

If hopes were dupes, fears may be liars;

It may be, in yon smoke concealed,

Your comrades chase e'en now the fliers,

And, but for you, possess the field.

For while the tired waves, vainly breaking

Seem here no painful inch to gain,

Far back through creeks and inlets making,

Comes silent, flooding in, the main.

And not by eastern windows only,

When daylight comes, comes in the light,

In front the sun climbs slow, how slowly,

But westward, look, the land is bright.

An Irish Airman Foresees His Death

by W. B. Yeats

I know that I shall meet my fate

Somewhere among the clouds above;

Those that I fight I do not hate

Those that I guard I do not love;

My country is Kiltartan Cross,

My countrymen Kiltartan’s poor,

No likely end could bring them loss

Or leave them happier than before.

Nor law, nor duty bade me fight,

Nor public man, nor cheering crowds,

A lonely impulse of delight

Drove to this tumult in the clouds;

I balanced all, brought all to mind,

The years to come seemed waste of breath,

A waste of breath the years behind

In balance with this life, this death.

An Exequy to His Matchless Never to be Forgotten Friend (1657)

Henry King

Sleep on, my love, in thy cold bed,

Never to be disquieted!

My last goodnight! Thou wilt not wake

Till I thy fate shall overtake;

Till age, or grief, or sickness must

Marry my body to that dust

It so much loves, and fill the room

My heart keeps empty in thy tomb.

Stay for me there, I will not fail

To meet thee in that hollow vale.

And think not much of my delay;

I am already on the way,

And follow thee with all the speed

Desire can make, or sorrows breed.

Each minute is a short degree,

And every hour a step towards thee.

At night when I betake to rest,

Next morn I rise nearer my west

Of life, almost by eight hours’ sail,

Than when sleep breathed his drowsy gale.

Thus from the sun my bottom steers,

And my day’s compass downward bears;

Nor labour I to stem the tide

Through which to thee I swiftly glide.

‘Tis true, with shame and grief I yield,

Thou like the van first took’st the field,

And gotten hath the victory

In thus adventuring to die

Before me, whose more years might crave

A just precedence in the grave.

But hark! my pulse like a soft drum

Beats my approach, tells thee I come;

And slow howe’er my marches be,

I shall at last sit down by thee.

The thought of this bids me go on,

And wait my dissolution

With hope and comfort. Dear, (forgive

The crime) I am content to live

Divided, with but half a heart,

Till we shall meet and never part.

对于Grace来说，她期待找到一条道路让自己的婚姻继续下去，但突然发现自己的同行者已经不再想继续走下去，她孤立无援，她期待一个人能来帮帮她，但是没有，她必须重新找回自我，否则就会死亡，幸好她有诗歌；对于吉米来说，父母之间压抑的气氛让他选择独立的生活，父母之间婚姻的破裂让他成为一个被抛弃的人，尽管如此他还是得作为父母之间的纽带来传达这该死的境况，他们从未认识到他们伤害了他，但幸好他还有朋友，并且与母亲达成了和解；对于霍华德，抱歉容我先骂一句，这懦弱的男人，作为孩子和女性，实在无法共情一位出轨的父亲和丈夫，也许这段婚姻应该被结束，但他应该拿出更大的勇气面对这一切，而不是躲在儿子和另一个女人背后，在结束的那一刻，我看不到他对于妻子的尊重，那可笑的理由，oh我给不了她想要的，直接说我爱上了另一女人就可以了，这虚伪的理由只能掩盖你婚内出轨的事实而已，他没有幸好👌。最后，我真实的想骂一句，我讨厌一切介入一段婚姻关系的人，尽管你觉得或者他\她觉得他们的婚姻已经名存实亡，我坚持认为这是一种恶毒的行为，更不用说“之前三个人痛苦，现在只有一个人痛苦”这种论调了！